At least I caught the bus

Some mornings I wake up and before my toes even touch the floor the day says to me “Listen man, I can’t give you much else today, but at least you’ll catch the bus.” And I’m late leaving the house for one reason and another, so when I do get to the crosswalk the other light is green, and traffic is flying by. I can see the bus lumbering not-far-enough up the street, and think “Oh no, I’ll have to wait for the next one,” but then somehow everything aligns. The lights change. I cross the street and step right up onto the bus without breaking my stride. It’s the hole-in-one of commuting. I have to admit, it’s a pretty good feeling. I glow slightly afterword. The rest of the day is hot garbage, but at least I caught the bus.

There was a moment around midday I felt so overwhelmed that I wished I could have a minor cardio infraction just so I could get out of work. Nothing fatal, just enough to get a few weeks of paid leave without using up my limited, and frankly quite valuable, vacation time. Maybe some people I don’t like would hear about it and feel bad. Unlikely, I know. But the possibility was enough to give me hope.

There aren’t enough monuments commemorating normal people surviving the absolute mundanity of living every day. Idiot management, mindless work, the entire concept of commuting. We deserve a parade everyday for the casual abuse we put up with for just being here.

If life was a video game I’d have forced a hard reset long ago. I’d have unplugged the console from the wall and thrown it into the river. Dropped a brick into a reusable grocery bag with all the lousy cartridges, and let the entire thing sink deep into the silt.

There was this old man in the hospital, on his deathbed. He survived his wife, who loved him very much despite his faults, and his daughter said he was a good dad even though he never felt like he measured up. His life was long and ordinary. Just before he passed, he took his daughter’s hand into his and said “This world has a lot to offer, I just never really got the hang of it.” 

But at least I caught the bus.