Sour face

January 2, 2024 | Comics

Sour face - thumbnail

The original sour candy

Did you ever play the Sour Face game when you were a kid? No? Good news then, it’s never too late. Official rules are included in this comic, so you don’t even need to go through all the hassle and fun of growing up on an apple farm. Go!

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Space squid t-shirt

December 14, 2023 | Illustration

I will name him Glorp and I will hug him and pet him and squeeze him.

When a three-eyed space squid falls in love with the Challenger space shuttle, you just let them have it. NASA would probably agree. I’m sure they have lots of rules about space ships and alien love affairs.

This silly octopus drawing exists because I needed a new t-shirt. But now that I have that I want calamari. This shirt makes me hungry. And a little amorous. But mostly hungry.

Digital illustration created in Procreate on an iPad Pro.

Shirt mockup with an illustration of a space squid lovingly hugging a space shuttle.
True love.
Illustration of a space squid lovingly hugging a space shuttle. Full colour.
Full colour.
Illustration of a space squid lovingly hugging a space shuttle. Magenta line art.
Line art.
Detail of a space squid lovingly hugging a space shuttle.
Detail of space squid.
Detail of a space squid lovingly hugging a space shuttle. Focus on the shuttle rockets.
Detail of space shuttle.

Suit up

Unique science fiction and fantasy shirts like this one are available on my Etsy shop.

Hay now

December 9, 2023 | Comics

Hay now - thumbnail

What doesn’t kill you makes you itchy

Growing up on a farm is full of unique experiences that cannot and will not under any circumstances be recreated as a wholly (or partially) rational adult. You can’t make me!!

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Fish atop a tower of rocks

December 3, 2023 | Blog

Goldfish in a bowl atop a small tower of rocks
Blub, blub.

Still digging through some old doodles. Sometimes you want to draw, but you don’t know what to draw, so you just draw rocks. And fish. And call it a day.

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Grab Bag

November 18, 2023 | Comics

Grab Bag - thumbnail

It’s Halloween! Keep your eyes on the skies!

The crows steal some halloween candy from a kid.

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Robot with a Napoleon complex

November 5, 2023 | Blog

Robot wearing a Napoleon style hat
Complex? No, it’s very simple, really.

It’s not that robot thinks he’s better than you. He doesn’t think about you at all.

Watercolour, ink, etc.

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Yes, and…it’s a crow in an army helmet

October 3, 2023 | Blog

Crow in an army helmet smoking a cigarette.
I love the smell of garbage day in the morning.

I was writing about how I had nothing to write about, so just enjoy this silly illustration of a crow in an army helmet, but then that reminded of something to write about and so now I’m writing about that.

This drawing reminded me of how important going one step further is to an illustration. This drawing is made of three things: a crow, an army helmet and a cigarette. Individually they are all boring props. Together they almost tell a story. I could have just drawn a crow. But I went one step further, and added a stupid hat and a bad habit and made it passably interesting.

It’s a bit like “yes, and…” thinking from improv comedy. There’s a crow. Yes, and… garbage day is like a war zone. Yes, and… he likes to relax with a smoke after tearing into a big bag of trash.

Anyway, enjoy this silly illustration of a crow in an army helmet.

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Little voices can suck it

September 9, 2023 | Blog

An alien satellite spies on a tiny bug on a mushroom.
I already have a subscription to The Galaxy Gazette.

I started a new story a few weeks ago. I’m waist deep in roughs and writing, and it’s coming along. It wants to exist, so who am I to stand in the way? Come on little story! let’s find you a nice place to live!

I’ve been afraid of this story for a while. The idea came to me in 2018 when the family moved back to Ottawa. Maybe a little before then, when I was here alone for a few months. But the little voices kept tearing it down. It’s amazing how convincing those little voices can be. They don’t even exist! How do they have so much control over my creative output? “It’s too long,” they said. “You can’t write,” they said. “Nobody will read it,” they said. Miserable little voices pissing on everything.

So the little voices are getting a sound beating behind the barn, an oily rag stuffed in their blathering yapper, stuffed into an old gym bag and dropped over a bridge. Metaphorically. Because they don’t exist. That’s a violent mix of visuals. It might be time for a nap.

If there’s a lesson here, it’s that you gotta make what you gotta make. That’s all there is.

Also this week, the kids went back to school. Cracker Jack started high school! I can’t be certain but I think I live in a time anomaly, because I’m fairly positive she was just born yesterday. I mean, she was just a wee baby on my arm, and now she’s a mostly grown person doing mostly grown person things and it’s all just too wild for me to think about.

Lastly, I’m currently diving into Cable Ties. I didn’t know they existed until a few days ago. What else don’t I know about?! They’re brilliant!

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Art and sausages and probably aliens

August 28, 2023 | Blog

Weird cat stalking you over the blanket.
Everything you’re doing is bad.

This year for my birthday I decided to not be a depressing sack of gravel and actually enjoy life. I took my favourite people to the National Gallery of Canada for a much needed art infusion, and it was exactly what I needed. It’s a beautiful space, with lots of beautiful art. There’s too much to see in one visit, but we were strategic about it, and left very happy.

Equally as impressive – we were able to navigate to and from downtown Ottawa without getting lost, angry, or convinced we would spend the rest of our miserable lives stuck in the car because how do you even get out of downtown Ottawa without a military escort or a sherpa? I know you’re thinking “data plan, and gps” and you’d be technically correct, but I haven’t got either of those things, and I like to think life is much more interesting because of it.

Anyway, besides the thankfully bland commute, excellent art, and my favourite people, I also grilled sausages, served them with very old cheese, and that was the end of an all around great day.

Except the part in the morning when Omega accidentally let Hazel the cat escape the house, then proceeded to live her worst nightmare while the rest of us tried to find the dumb cat. I walked up a couple streets, and by the time I returned, in typical cat fashion, Hazel was sitting nonchalantly in the back yard like nothing had happened. Nobody knows where she went, nobody saw her return. She was just there.

My best guess is she took the opportunity to check in with her alien supervisors, upload all the data she has accumulated over the past several years, maybe she ran a few interstellar errands, and then returned to her post. You know, usual cat stuff.

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Firing on one cylinder

August 12, 2023 | Blog

Francis the sheep in her astronaut suit holds a ridiculously oversized laser gun on her shoulder.
Sheep go boom.

Creative malaise creeps in with cat-like efficiency, a million tiny unseen movements by a living statue, completely unnoticed until it’s suddenly asleep in your lap. Then you want a snack, so you try to get off the couch, but you can’t because this clearly overweight feline has claimed your legs, has no visible intention of leaving any time soon, and you’re like “How long has this thing been here?!”

I have a story I’ve dragged my heals on for nearly 6 years, and the only way past this current psychological hijack is to bring it to life. My brain has been given permission to work the problem. It slowly circles the idea. Tiny lights on the console flicker to life. Fluorescent lights illuminate the room. A whirring of gears, a humming of mysterious electricity deep within the grey goo.

Anyway, here is a lovely drawing of Francis the sheep holding what can only be considered a very large weapon. Maybe? It might be a culinary device. It might make donuts holes. Or sausages. You never can tell what the future holds. Or space-faring sheep, for that matter.

Arthur C. Clarke said “Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.” This isn’t that.

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