Douglas Adams on perspective

December 24, 2014 | Blog

The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well, on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.

Douglas Adams

Kurt Vonnegut on profanity

December 11, 2014 | Blog

…profanity and obscenity entitle people who don’t want unpleasant information to close their eyes and ears to you.

Kurt Vonnegut, Hocus Pocus

That and “know your audience” were the two morsels of fatherly wisdom I served up last night. BOOM MOTHERFUCKERS.


General rule

November 19, 2014 | Blog

I have this general rule that the thing a company became famous for is the only thing you should buy from them. Nowhere is this more true than kids products. For example, Disney makes good movies, but lousy bed sheets, ugly lamps, and questionable toys. I haven’t read a single book from a toy maker that was worth the paper it was printed on.


The world is a lie

November 12, 2014 | Blog

Apparently Curious George isn’t a monkey at all, but a chimp. And Hello Kitty isn’t a cat. I need to lie down.


Don Draper and George Carlin on language

October 28, 2014 | Blog

If you don’t like what’s being said, change the conversation.

Don Draper, Mad Men

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.

George Carlin

I think they’re agreeing with each other.


Joseph Heller on paranoia

October 22, 2014 | Blog

Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t after you.

Joseph Heller, Catch-22

Facebook is annoying

August 8, 2014 | Blog

Facebook is like that annoying kid you ask to stop with the annoying thing but they’re all hopped on sugar or bad parenting or something and they’re somebody else’s kid so you can’t touch them, and it’s a public place so they keep pressing buttons and Daddy’s out back having a smoke trying to remember what peace and quiet tastes like. Is this still annoying? Yes. Is this still annoying? Yes. What city do you live in? Carrying Place. Nope. Yes I do. Not in the database. Then stop asking me. How about Ottawa? STOP ASKING ME.

Also. Facebook Messenger. Who gives a shit? Not this guy. I’m pointing my thumbs at my chest while I type this which is really difficult so respect.


The knack to flying

June 25, 2014 | Blog

The Guide says there is an art to flying”, said Ford, “or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Douglas Adams, Life, the Universe and Everything

For my daughter, who hasn’t quite found the knack yet. Haha.


Dress codes

June 4, 2014 | Blog

Did we have dress codes in high school? We must have. I don’t recall anyone being sent home because of their attire, and we all dressed like homeless people. I guess that’s not as offensive as jean shorts or bra straps.